


I hate birthdays

by BunyRock



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Birthday, Christmas, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-24
Updated: 2018-12-24
Packaged: 2019-09-26 11:15:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,231
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17140760
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BunyRock/pseuds/BunyRock
Summary: Happy birthday Levi Ackerman.A little story how Levi celebrates his birthday and Christmas nor that erwin is gone and how they used to celebrate it.





	I hate birthdays

Levi never wanted to celebrate Christmas or his birthday, but ever since he met Erwin he tolerated the celebration of it. The past years he actually enjoyed the festivities and even smiled here and there. Erwin truly had a talent to make him enjoy such silly traditions, most likely because he turns Levi's birthday night into a love filled one every year. 

However Levi doesn't want to celebrate this in any from any longer. The first years after Erwins death, he beat the shit out of Hanji, who tried to force Levi to celebrate. The second year after Erwins death Levi is slone, just like he wished to be. 

With Erwin now having a proper grave, Levi makes himself comfortable on top of it. His back is resting against the ice cold stone with the elegantly written name of Erwin on it. The bolo tie of Erwin is resting in Levi's hand and abenstmindely he strokes with his thumb over the clear stone. While his mind is running with memories of Erwin and hiw they have spend the Christmas time together, his cup of tea turns as cold as the ground that it is resting on. 

 

The great hall, that is usually there for them all to eat in or make big announcements for the whole survey corps, is filled with happy chatter, laughter and warm light coming from all kind of light sources. The winter is dark and cold here, but it makes the warmth of the festivity even more comfortable. There are candles on the tables, a big pine tree in the back of the hall, decorated with light and cookies and wood figurines, everything made by the members of the corps themselves. 

The air is thick with the smell of cooked food and baked treats, that are placed all over the tables, which are decorated in warm red and deep green. Candles are placed everywhere to lighten up the room and bring a warm feeling to it. Not all survey Corps members are there, some prefer to celebrate with their families, but those that see the regiment as their family stayed and few stayed for another event, that comes along with christmas:

Levi's birthday. 

Until Erwin found out about Levi's birthday and Hanji insisting on celebrating it, Levi never celebrated any birthday. Of course he would have a little present in Stock for Isabel and Farlan and they would have a tiny surprise for him as well, but none of them made a big deal out of it. However people in the survey corps are different. Erwin always brought the finest tea for Levi, Hanji would have a new cleaner Levi could Test and the others tried to find something, that could make Levi smile. He didn't smiled at all, not when everyone was around, or just very solemnly. Just Erwin received a smile later, when they were alone and enjoying the evening in any way Levi wanted, which was mostly with testing the new tea and talking together while enjoying the warmth of the other one. They talked for hours about tea and other nonsense just to lighten themselves up. Unlike the heated nights of Erwins birthday, these were filled with a deep bonding on a spiritual level. Not their bodies united this night (not always), but their minds and soul formed a way deeper connection than any physical one could do. 

They meant a lot to Levi and he started to enjoy them and look forward to these festivities. 

 

This year his tea is not as fine as it used to be, but it doesn't matter anyway. It turned cold while he leans there on the gravestone looking up into the sky. Some dark heavy clouds slowly crawl along the darkening blue and only reveal the brightness every now and then. The blue reminds him of Erwins eyes, but as shadowed as it is from the clouds as shadowed gets his memories of them. It's only been two years, but in this harsh time faces start to vanish very quickly. Yet the feeling remains. The hard throbbing in his chest, the crawling of his skin, when he touched him and the warmth that went along with Erwins voice. Now only the cold air wraps its icy fingers around him, just to remind him that he is alone. 

"Not yet. My promise isn't fulfilled Erwin."

He whispers into the growing darkness and walks off again. 

 

Shuffled away snow, heavy breathing and a wet trail, reveal that someone approaches the graveyard. Heavily he falls down on the ground and doesn't even care about the dirt underneath him, nor the cold hard floor, nor the fresh flowers he just crushed. His only wish was to reach this gravestone and rest. His legs are sprawled out and his back leans on the cold stone. Irregularly goes his breathing and his chest rises and sinks slow and heavy. Levi Ackerman, humanities strongest, feels beat. The winter does one good thing when you are hurt, the cold numbs his body, so he doesn't feel the pain that much and it slows down the bleeding the longer he stays out here. 

He beat the hoard of titans all by himself and chased after the man who took his meaning in life away from him, but he couldn't go far before his world started to turn. He didn't wanted to die now, not alone, not here, so he gathered the last bit of strength he had to get here to Erwins grave. As he speaks his voice fades away to nothing more than a harsh rattled breathing, but there was no one there to listen anyway. 

"I failed you. I couldn't... Couldn't keep... My promise."

The tiny clouds before his mouth get thinner and thinner with every breath he takes. And with the last bit of air leaving his body he whispers "Erwin" to the figure that appeared before his eyes. For Levi it was a tall man with broad shoulders, that came walking towards him. Erwin was there to take him with him into a world free from pain and danger. He smiles at Levi understanding and without any sound he says:

"You did well Levi. I am glad you are with me now. Thank you for everything. Rest with me and don't worry anymore."

 

"It's Levi! Oh my god! Levi! Levi!"

Hanji Zoe shouts with tears in her eyes. She hurries to to bloody body of her friend only to find him dead. His face lost all of its color and his eyes lost their gleam, but yet his worried look is no more and he looks at peace. Levi died there on his birthday from the wounds he got from fighting a hoard of titans without having killed Zeke. He wasn't able to fulfill his promise to Erwin, but he is now free from any worries and reunited with the people he cared for and with the one he loved, before their faces could vanish from his memories completely. 

He is buried right next to Erwin due to Hanji's wish. She knew how much Erwin meant to him and she is glad they are together now, but she had lost the last one of her old friends, that kept giving her some kind of hope, but Hanji still carries on, lost in the harsh reality with a burden she can't carry. 

 


End file.
